The bartender's working on a
late night shift
She's bonka blonds and Bon
aims on a midnight drift
And the dance band's playing
the same old slam
I'm sinking whiskey and
you're sipping fine wine
I don't know what it is
you're trying to prove
Well it should be you but
it's me who can hardly move
And I've got my reputation
lying on the line
Come on baby, be a good dog
and help the blind

[CHORUS]
Won't you carry me home
(Like a truck, pick me up)

You ain't no lady but you've
sure got taste in men
That head of yours has got
you by time and time again
My arms and legs are aching
and my head's about to blow
And your back's been
breakin' and I'd hate to
spoil the show
But I've just spent next
weeks wages and I'm right
out of coin
But you want more and it's
half past four and they want
to close the joint
But we can't afford a taxi,
and it's too late for the
bus
But I've been told by
friends of mine you're
someone I can trust

[CHORUS]
Won't you carry me home
(Don't let me lie here in
all this beer)

You drank all your booze and
half of mine
I'm bleary eyed and you're
waiting for the sunshine
(to come and kill me)
Just like the man who threw
me on the floor
Don't matter, while I'm down
here I might as well try
and find the fucking door
Excuse me, have you seen my
swizzle stick
And have you got a plastic
bag 'cause I'm gonna be sick
I'm dead drunk and heave'n
hanging upside down
And you're getting up and
leaving, you think I'm gonna
drown

[CHORUS]
Won't you carry me home