I didn't bother coming on back home
I didn't bother calling you on the phone,
'cause there are the little punches, they won't hurt anymore
You're getting sleepy, this won't hurt anymore

You better mind your p's and q's
You better thank your lucky stars, this
the bigger fish ain't made a meal out of you
I'm drinking wine I didn't squeeze out of you

I'm a swinging axe
I'm a baseball bat
I'm the cudgel sort,
and I'm a quick reply,
a fast retort

Always aiming to save my skin,
and looks like my lucky day
Bottoms up on the cup of the bold ones
"It looks like I'll be home for the holidays"

I got your hangin' ups
Well, go to sleep little girl
Don't you wait up

And this was never meant to feel good
I never said it'd fly
Don't call me at the office,
and don't you pass me in the hall

And let the Ceasar have the Brutus,
and let the Judas have the face,
'cause, did you think I'm bare and distant?
It's good to know you feel the same
I'm a swinging axe
I'm a baseball bat
hiding in the hall

I'm staring at you so hard

Don't say I never warned you
when I set the house on fire
And I spread myself in your garden
to keep an eye on you awhile

And all your final moments,
a job that hates you, too
Just remember, I spent this whole life
lying to myself and you

This was never meant to feel good
I never said it'd fly
So, don't call me at the office,
because I'm laughing in the hall

So, are you baptised in the water
of a little place called trust?
'Cause you can do whatever you want to,
'cause they will not destroy us
No, they will not destroy us

I'd rather it be me